The Menace of Abuja Marriage (and Lagos, and PH, and…)
The thing tire me o. What is it with this Abuja marriage of a thing? For those who don’t understand, let me explain:
1. When a married man, whose wife is in another location, and is ignorant of his arrangement, dates and lives with another woman in his location, that is Abuja marriage.
2. When an unmarried man seriously dates and leads on an unmarried woman, mainly for financial gain, knowing he’ll never take her home to mama, that is Abuja marriage.
3. When a man actually marries a woman, knowing he’s only with her because, for the time being, she’s financially better than he is, all the time knowing that when his circumstances change, he’ll divorce her, that is Abuja marriage
In fact, there are many more instances and examples of Abuja marriage, and girls play the lead role sometimes too. I don’t know why it’s called Abuja marriage, this happens everywhere! Maybe someone will enlighten us.
Someone I used to know was a perpetuator of Abuja marriage. Lol. He married a much older woman for financial gain. While I know age is nothing but a number, I’m not in support of a 20 year old difference per the woman.
The worst part of it is that we would go to visit him, she would come out, entertain us, and go inside, and he would tell my H.A.C.E and I she was his aunty.
They did a court wedding, and nobody knew, and we were somewhat close. Imagine?!
At some point, I even tried to advise him to rent an apartment for her elsewhere, as I felt she was too doting for aunt, and his girlfriends would be put off by the fact that they were too close. He told me he would look into it.
Na so kasala burst one day. We didn’t know they had been fighting. We went to the house. As usual, his “Aunty” came out and asked us what our friend explained their relationship to be. Innocently, H.A.C.E said ” we know you’re his mother’s sister”.
My brothers and sisters, the rest is history. Even our friendship. He left that house that day, with police escort, after the woman had given us the full and complete gist of their relationship. She also tore the marriage certificate in front of us.
Apparently, he had been telling people she was his aunt, and she had been hearing snippets. She had also tried to initiate communication with his family, but he wouldn’t give her contact details.
Na so that one end o. And he left with nothing. It turned out she owned everything, including his cars.
The menace is real. Now, I have 2 questions:
A. How does one avoid falling prey to Abuja marriages.
B. In the event that one has fallen prey, what next? How can one overcome?
Please don’t read and run (I see you o)
Hugs and plenty kisses,